You are a child…

This was written by a very courageous lady. I will let her words tell her story.

To you, I shall reveal my heart…

[Update 2022 Aug 22 This photo which Jessie thought was her, the middle child, which she found on a video appears not to be. There has been much controversy about the photo and it has not been properly answered by Jessie. I have given some explanation at the bottom of this post. 2022 Aug 22 cathyfoxblog Luciferian Baby Roast [6]  ]

  • Do you know what being born into “this world”, into Pharaohs house, was really like?
  • Can you understand or even begin to comprehend the depravity of the one who rules?
  • Do you know what it’s like to be chosen; especially when you never wanted the job in the first place?

Even though you are saved by the grace of God and out…in their eyes you are never really out.

The first thing they instill is the fear of death.

Do you know what its like…

  • To have no options?
  • To have to place your life daily into the enemies’ hands?

There is no one to trust. Trust is never part of the vocabulary.

Do you know what its like…

  • To live in a world where the outcome of every choice only means death…?
  • …and you are never certain if it is your life or someone elses?

You are a child…placed in the care of one who has to raise you up.

Placed in the care of the one who has to let you see all their deeds done in darkness, and yet who would take your life at the first opportunity she got.

Why? In order for you to take your place she knows you are the one who shall end her life.

There is an unspoken hatred between you, modelled the day you were chosen as her successor, when you observed her behead the one she herself was succeeding.

Then later attending the service of a closed casket suicide…
You know the truth, you saw it. Yet lies, falsehoods…and they cry and grieve and mourn…and console one another.
You know the hidden truth but must keep to the second code of survival you have learned.

Silence is golden, never tell.

Do you know…

  • What it means to really count the cost?
  • What is the cost of your silence?
  • What it is like to know the numbers really involved, the numbers of those who live and of those who die every single day?

Imagine beginning training at age four and a half, and each month of your training until age ten you observed over 1000 deaths a month….

Imagine these deaths occurred before your face…

Others involved got the privelege of being drugged or sedating the truth. But not you…

If you closed your eyes,

if you looked away,

if you spoke out against or tried to intervene…

…the torture before the death would be more violent, more horrific, more extended and prolonged.

You learned to not turn away. You quickly learned to watch quietly and intently, because that was a grace and a mercy to the victims.

Now add to all this…

The majority of those thousands of deaths were caused by your every decision or indecision to participate.
Participating meant engaging in the evil willingly.
Every moment of every day was a fight for life..not only yours but others.
Nothing was ever written in stone.
One moment a decision would bring the life you desired to save, while another time the same decision brought terrible excruciating death upon someone.

I awoke each morning to go to school, but I did not really attend school in the normal sense. They used the day time to train, they used the night time to train, there was never a break in the training, so that by age ten I was fully trained, fully capable, fully qualified to take that position should something unforeseen happen.

The training was real, it was intense, every moment was a fight for life.
All this was done before others eyes…but they did not see…no one outside this occult world knew what was going on but me, my proctor and training partner.

I was given someone my age to train with. We would arrive at school and never knew where we would end up. Sometimes we were there, sometimes somewhere else, and sometimes flown out of the country and back before the end of the day.

Each day we were exposed to a different life or death situation.
To learn combat and protecting ourselves and each other we were thrown into a dark room or situation with assassins. Their only job in order to live was that they must kill us.
In order to survive we must kill them.

Now imagine that beyond traditional forms of defense combat you are also dealing with evil spirits…you are learning psychological warfare. These assassins don’t just attack physically, but they can attack you through their demons. You find yourself having to combat more than just a couple assassins to live to see the light of day.

Your one grace from God in this situation is that you have already come into a saving relationship with the Lord and He has given to you the gift of being able to hear and see into the spiritual world, to discern the spirits.

To be able to detect the attack before it comes and to be able to communicate that attack to your training partner…to truly work as one, to know each other’s every thought, every move, every step before it is made. He alone is the only person you can somewhat begin to trust in, because you know in order for him to live, he must keep you alive. When you are together, the demons are forced to stay away from him.

These days of training bring you to the deepest places of depravity.

  • You see the storehouses of infants being bred for sacrifice and to serve…
  • You observe the slaughter rooms, the altars of sacrifices, the barns in the woods reserved for the deaths of traitors…
  • You see the carnage of rituals that involve cannibalism and know the mess left for the clean up crew…
  • You see the sexual rituals, and watch as infants and children are raped by men, women and demons…
  • You attend the auction houses and see thousands of children sold without a word in one hour…
  • You visit places of high privelege, homes of those in power and international influence…
  • You watch as they make their blood covenants and toast to ungodly alliances…

You are there only to be exposed to the depth of wickedness, to join them in their ungodly hours.

If you happen to be locked at home or in someone else’s basement you find all sorts of dead things, not just animals, but people. Every sense is attuned to what is going on around you. You hear and smell the blood as it drips…you trip and slip and find yourself in a pool of blood with a cold dead body next to you.

The ground is not your only enemy. You may find these things hanging, or on the wall, or worse yet, sprung out of coffins or couches. The only safe place is at the head of the steps right next to the door that leads outside.

You have hours till they unlock that door so you wait in silence, in anger. This is part of your training where they are testing. They want to know how much can you take in and see before breaking down and losing control.

Yet, to their surprise you keep plucking along. You see it all, you retain it all without breaking. You fulfill your duty of learning the organization, its processes, the selecting of workers and the placing of them in departments of the organization…you learn the procedures, the protocols.

When they release you from the Devils lair you find they have your siblings at the kitchen table eating lunch. The butchers knife next to your proctors hand does not go undetected…she scolds…”there you are…you know better than to hide from me…what have I told you about hiding…come sit down and eat your lunch.”

They define the narrative of reality. The unspoken code is always there -the symbols and the dual language. If you tell, if you say or do something they don’t like, there is only death.

Finally when the day is done…it doesn’t matter what you have been through or seen throughout that day, the nightmare does not end.

You get ready for bed, but before you even get in the bed you must check it. You cautiously feel the mattress, the pillow, and underneath the bed for anything that can kill you.
It’s your lucky night if you have not found needles with poison, thin sharp spikes, butcher knives or some other form of weapon.

You know it’s bad when by age aged four and a half, you can walk in a room and in less than one minute detect over twenty dangers for yourself and others as well as having a plan of defense in case any of those situations are to occur.

So the bed is clear…but guess you get to sleep? No, training is not done…
Now you hear noises, you hear her calling you to come and join her in the hallway.
Everyone else in the house is asleep and drugged from dinner, so you know that even if you find yourself in danger you cannot cry for help.

No one will come.
There is no where to run.
There is no where to hide.
So why try?

You are fully in the hands of the one intent on killing you. She has a vengeance…she hates you…and at night all her demons come out….

In all of this your only Savior is Jesus Christ. He alone ensures your survival through the next day. “You learn to live by faith and not by sight”.

This does not even begin to describe what life was truly like in Pharaohs house…but it gives you a taste…so you may know that silence is not golden…

I’ve played that game for 34 years and these people do not stop…a different approach is needed…the Lord is foiling their plans so that no man may boast…all the glory shall be His and His alone…I’m not saying wisdom and caution go on without precedence…

This is where some of the struggle for me stems from…this is what lies behind every action my heart takes…because I know…I truly know and understand the extent of this world with no bounds….and what it means to be redeemed and to fight to take full ownership of that redemption that is given not just for you but for all people….

I only post on Twitter at present, if you have found this post useful, please post on other social media – facebook, instagram, pinterest, gab – whichever ones you are on. This is most helpful to spread the information. The people who do this are essential. Thankyou.


[1] #SilenceBreaksForthIntoSong

[2] 2019 Texorcist Podcast Mothers of Darkness Castle – The Most Evil Place On Earth”

[3] 2020 Jan 18 cathyfox blog The Five Child Trafficking Networks of the Illuminati

[4] Bride Ministeries Illuminati Structure Explained by One Chosen as a Mother of Darkness

[5] Bride Ministeries My Training to Become a Mother of Darkness in the Illuminati featuring Jane

[6] 2022 Aug 22 cathyfoxblog Luciferian Baby Roast

  • The Sanctuary for the Abused [A] has advice on how to prevent triggers.
  • National Association for People Abused in Childhood [B] has a freephone helpline and has links to local support groups.
  • One in Four [C]
  • Havoca [D].
  • Useful post on Triggers [E]  from SurvivorsJustice [F] blog.
  • Jim Hoppers pages on Mindfulness [G]  and Meditation [H] may be useful.
  • Hwaairfan blog An Indigenous Australian Approach to Healing Trauma  [J]
  • Survivors UK for victims and survivors of male rape or the sexual abuse of men [K]
  • Voicing CSA group [L] helps arrange survivors meetings in your area
  • A Prescription for me blog Various emotional support links [M]
  • Fresh Start Foundation Scottish not for profit group, helping child sexual abuse victims & survivors  [N]

[A] Sanctuary for the Abused

Let justice be done though the heavens fall – Fiat justitia ruat cælum

About cathy fox blog on Child Abuse

the truth will out, the truth will shout, the truth will set us free...
This entry was posted in #CSASurvivorsStories, #OpDeathEaters, #pedogate, cathyfoxblog, Child Abuse, Child sexual abuse, Child trafficking, Freemason, US of America Child Abuse, VIP CSA and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

55 Responses to You are a child…

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  6. Christa Ford says:

    This is one of the most profound blog posts she has shared from her deepest heart, and I’m so touched by all the incredible depths she waded through at the most tender of years!!! Jesus was there w her through it ALL and delivered her! Praise His Name!

    Liked by 1 person

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  44. Ashley Hanks says:

    Thank you for this site and trying to spread the word. I appreciate all that you do.

    Liked by 1 person

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